Thinking About Marriage?

Proverbs 19:22; 20:6,18,25: "What a man desires is unfailing love . . . . Many a man claims to have unfailing love, but a faithful man who can find? . . . . Make plans by seeking advice . . . . It is a trap for a man to dedicate something rashly and only later to consider his vows."

The desire of our hearts is to find someone who will love us unconditionally and unfailingly; the irony is that finding faithful love is like finding a needle in a haystack. We know that ultimately God can only provide this level of love perfectly; still, those who are contemplating marriage should take time to make certain that the person whom they are dating will love them, despite "the good, the bad, and the ugly" that may come their way years later. I'm a firm believer that true character is revealed in times of temptation and tribulation. Time is your biggest advocate, for it gives you the opportunity of observing the potential marriage partner when things aren't going so well. If you see "red flags" during the difficult times, be assured that these red flags are heaven sent. Try to take a step back and look at the relationship objectively. Many times, these red flags are warning signs to alert you that this person may have some character traits that could be painful to your marriage and even destructive of your marriage.

If you are making plans toward marriage, seek advice of those mature followers of Christ, who can give you Godly counsel about the relationship. Notice that I said "mature followers of Christ." Seeking the counsel of immature people leads one down the road to misery, for these types of people will tell you what you want to hear, not what ultimately is best for you.

Then once you have had sufficient time to observe the relationship and consider Godly counsel, proceed accordingly. Don't forget that hasty relational decisions are "ticking time bombs." For the Word of God tells us, "it is a trap for a man to dedicate something rashly and only later to consider his vows."